2013 coming to a close - What a year ?????

As 2013 comes to an end, want to sign off saying it tested me, tried me to the hilt and also enabled me embark a new journey. It was a blessed year where I could feel the blessings of my Guru/Mentor and all my well wishers reach me from where ever they might be. I felt enriched and truly blessed.

Thank you all, for being part of my life, for impacting it in the ways you do and all i am or will be, would be because of you, am really nothing by myself. You all and your trust in my abilities keeps me going.

I would remember this year, am sure, as a key turning point, may be in times to come.

2013, enabled me scale new depths in understanding relationships, watch their dynamics more closely besides presenting great avenues to learn. Seems it kind of gave me a dose of five years rolled into one. Realised quite a few things about myself, watched myself grow.

Bid adieu to some “friends”, made few new associations. Launched experiments, set in a space i never experienced before, lets see where it takes me. 

I cannot Thank God enough.

2014, is close at heels, another year, new resolutions, new perspectives and ……….

Happy Guru Poornima

On the occasion of Guru Poornima today, my heartiest congratulations to all Bapu’s shrotas and my known katha fraternity.

I was in the middle of reading the last year Tampa katha on Manas Hanuman Chalisa from the katha booklets. Few shairs I wanted to share. All of us know them so well as Bapu makes frequent references to these. http://moraribapu.org/

Yeh Ek zakhmi Parinda hai Var mat karna

Panah maang raha hai Shikar mat karna.

Irada samne wala badal bhi sakta hai

Muqabla hi sahi pehle var mat karna.

By Rahat Indori

Mere Rahabara Mujhko gumrah kar de,

Suna hai ki manzil kareeba a rahi hai. 

By Barabankvi Saheb

This last one is so true when I think about Bapu

Usne dekhte hi mujhe duao se bhar diya,

Abhi maine usko sajda bhi kiya nahin hai.

Jo pine se pehle kadam ladakhadaye, 

Ye mai kaun si kaunsa maikada hai.

By Raj Kaushik

Jai Siya Ram !

Don’t call them confused, they are fence sitters

I have been fortunate to be traveling and visiting friends and families settled by and large in Europe and US since childhood. Just thought of jotting down some observations and patterns I observed in the last 3 decades.This is about those who immigrate from India as students or through work in early twenties, unmarried.

 We can categorize all such Indian immigrants to two types :

a.)    Those who love to be in the other continent, endorse the way of life, go there as students, meet someone from other or their own cultures, live with them for few years and eventually marry and settle down. In the same category there are those who wish to stay single, make money, make it very clear that they are happier there and Indian roots were good riddance. They too date and lead happy, carefree life severing all ties with India except with very close friends and relatives. Both types actually accept the fact that they like it there and are straight shooters. By and large they come from broad minded family backgrounds back in India.  Are very transparent, embrace change by nature.

b.)    Then there is the second category who lead segmented lives there - one for their parents and Indian culture and the other life is the American/ British or wherever they are that culture’s given. The latter is the life they love to death. But given the image they created with families back home they do not have the guts to break that image. Or maybe they are too hardwired to break it. Consequently these are the torn types who keep lingering decisions. There is a huge gap between the expectations they set with their families and the personal life they enjoy living abroad. You find them perpetually oscillating between normalcy and unpredictable behavior. They become quite concealing by nature.

It’s the second category which is not confused but fence sitters they want to sit in two boats where they are confident of manipulating both the worlds and keep them going.  Most of this type belong to conservative family backgrounds from India. They hold high reverence towards their parents and the ideals they endorse, unconsciously they dream of living that reality some day, they are also aware that those ideals are way too out of perspective to the life they are leading. There is no meeting point.

Most of such kind end up leading an unfulfilled life, lonely, wrought with depression related illnesses or heavy drinking in later years of their lives. In an extreme case I lost a cousin subscribing to this format. Very brilliant, gold medalist, engineer. Wish he had the guts to live one life, maintaining two faces makes one fall someday, that is the truth. Also its not worth it, embrace the life you love and pay the price that it takes – moderate the image at home, rest assured every one back home will still respect you. Its one life you have, live it to the lees.

Definition of a Guru - Bapu

Only I, me, myself in relationship

Its kind of weird for some people call anything a friendship even if there is only one person i.e themselves in it. They live in a make believe world, try and control the flow of the relationship either give it enough oxygen not to let it die or chop the roots so that it’s a bonsai according to their will.

At times when they are in need they connect 100 times, other times if they go “busy” then they go absconding. Its only one person in this friendship I, me, myself. No acknowledgement of the other.

What they really do not understand is people are nice to them not because what they are but because their friends are thorough gentlemen/ women.

Strange how beautifully we gull ourselves and complain about not having lasting relationships.Beware of such abusive treatment and the sooner you cut this off the better.